It Was Never If, But When, for Armstrong

It Was Never If, But When, for Armstrong

I may be the only person who ever looked at Lance Armstrong and thought of Pee-wee Herman.

 

Pee-wee Herman did this movie where he’s riding a bicycle down a hill ...

 

He’s going lickety-split, knees churning, and veers into a yard.

 

He hits a kid’s wagon or something.

 

He goes flying ass over tea kettle.

 

Lands on the ground.

 

Looks around.

 

Says, “I meant to do that.”

 

I kept waiting for it to happen to Armstrong. Finally, it did. So I loved 2012. It was the year Lance Armstrong got his.

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