May 07, 2009
NOTES FROM THE OVERSTUFFED
By Jeff NeumanThe sports scene in early May is a glutton’s delight: four series each in hockey and basketball, baseball starting to settle into its rhythm, football fans still debating the draft, horse racing and golf and boxing sending up flares, as well as the inevitable suspensions and rumors. Here are the quick takes from a busy week of working the remote…
Yes, I understand it’s used by men to jumpstart their testosterone following a steroids cycle, but still: a female fertility drug? Is this Manny being WoManny?
Derek Fisher’s shoulder block/elbow was an obvious flagrant foul and easy suspension, but Luis Scola went down so dramatically I expected to see Vince McMahon on the sidelines.
So Kobe Bryant elbows Ron Artest in the throat, and the refs call a loose-ball foul on Artest. Let’s just say that maybe the NBA didn’t want the Lakers to lose the first two games at home. Nice of the league to decide a day later that the play was actually a flagrant-one on Kobe. No doubt Artest feels that justice has been served, and we can put this nastiness behind us.
How thrilled was NBC to televise the three-overtime Detroit-Anaheim game on Sunday? The only thing better for the network than a game nobody’s watching is a game nobody’s watching that never ends. As part of any future NHL contracts, NBC will demand that overtime games be decided by a shootout between Jay Leno and Hayden Panettiere.
Mine That Bird is by Birdstone out of Mining My Own. It’s still a stupid name, and after the Preakness I don’t think we’ll have to waste much time remembering it.
It’s nice to see the Chicago Blackhawks in the second round. The last time they won a playoff series was 1996. The last time they made it to the Stanley Cup Finals was 1990. The last time they won a game in the Stanley Cup Finals, Spiro Agnew was still Vice President. And the last time they won the Cup was the day before the U.S. invasion at the Bay of Pigs.
If Anaheim takes out the Red Wings again, it will be their third series win over Detroit in three matchups since 2000. Can you still call yourself “Hockeytown” if you can’t get past The O.C.?
All seven games of the Atlanta-Miami series were blowouts, as will be all four games of Atlanta-Cleveland. In the interests of saving wear and tear on LeBron, can we simply move the Cavs into the next round now? This will also save the citizens of Atlanta from having to pretend they’re not just waiting for football to start.
The tournament that should be golf’s fourth major is taking place this week at TPC Sawgrass. It’s a great championship venue, with an intensely dramatic stretch of closing holes surrounding the sport’s most famous unnamed pond. Shifting THE PLAYERS – that’s the official typography – from March to May has helped the course play firm and fast, the way traditional golf courses should. Traditional golf courses, however, don’t feature much water at all, never mind a par-3 to a lily pad. Count on NBC to show us plenty of Tiger Woods’s shots live over the weekend, as long as he makes the cut; if he doesn’t, count on them to show plenty of his shots on tape.
What’s the difference between ESPN’s approach to baseball and that of the MLB Network? ESPN breaks into its games to show unrelated highlights from other sports to promo its signature newscast. MLBN breaks into its signature newscast to show interesting moments from any game live.
When Congress is done looking into the BCS, can they pass a law requiring Johan Santana and Zack Greinke to face each other in a meaningful game this season? There might be a pay-per-view audience for that one.
The poor English fight fans had barely gotten through two choruses of “Walking in a Hatton Wonderland” before Manny Pacquiao sent Ricky Hatton to dreamland. The light-welterweight fight lasted about as long as Brett Favre’s average retirement.
Hank, Hal, listen: If you surround your field with the equivalent of courtside seats at courtside prices, you’ll get the equivalent of courtside fans – people there to be seen, not to watch and root. They won’t come out if it’s rainy, they won’t sit there when it’s chilly, and they won’t be there in the late innings because they have meetings in the morning. Empty seats in the upper deck can be ignored by a telecast, but empty seats behind home plate are hard to miss.
If you like A-Rod, why would you spend money to read Selena Roberts’s book? And if you don’t like him, why would you spend time reading it?
