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December 15, 2008 12:55 PM

NFL Players Need Trash Talking Advice

From AOL Fanhouse, this exchange between Dolphins LB Joey Porter and 49ers TE Vernon Davis was overheard on the field yesterday by Fox's Chris Meyers:

Porter: You're not even in the scouting report.

Davis: I'm the best at everything.

Porter: You're the best at being ugly.


Wow. That's two stellar comebacks. First off, "I'm the best at everything." Way to go, Vernon! Wait, one thing you're not the best at: bragging. You didn't say anything specific you were going to do during the game nor did you have anything witty to say. (Perhaps something about not being included because not even the scouts could figure out how to stop you? I don't know, at least give me something better than 'best at everything.')

But, when it comes to dumb comments, Joey Porter always takes the cake, and he certainly comes through again here: "You're the best at being ugly." YES! I can only imagine Porter immediately looking around for teammates to high-five after that cutting barb. With so much material about Davis being an all-around disappoint for his entire NFL career Porter decided to go with an insult, as Chris Mottram on the Sporting Blog put it "ripped directly from the pages of Your Face Is Stupid: How to Insult Like a Third-Grader." Other insults Porter must have been considering include:
"You're the best at sucking!"
"Best at being a girl!"
"Best at being bad at football!"
"Yeah. Best idiot!”
And of course, "You're a doo-doo head."

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