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February 10, 2009 11:25 AM

The Most Ridiculous Take On The A-Rod Situation Yet

Yesterday, Alex Rodriguez admitted that yes, he took performance-enhancing drugs. People are angry. People are upset. People are crying for help from Uncle Phil. Wait ... huh?

John Kampf of The News Herald ("Serving Southern Ohio" -- ah, okay, makes sense), wrote in his column today that young athletes and kids who look up to A-Rod should ignore his excuses and reasons why he took PED's. Good point -- as always, we must protect the younger, more impressionable fans of the game. But, Kampf, how will you ever relate to a younger generation and cut through all their iPods and Facebooks?

Ah yes, of course, by writing that Rodriguez would've been benefited from having a positive role model in his life. Like Uncle Phil. A fictional character from a 1990's sitcom that starred Will Smith. And DJ Jazzy Jeff.

In February 1993, "The Fresh Prince of Bel Air" ran an episode dealing with teenagers coping with the pressures of finals, athletics and prom night.

In that episode, Will Smith's character secretly takes speed in order to stay alert and awake to meet all of the demands on his time. Until his cousin, Carlton, stumbles across the pill bottle in Will's locker, scarfing a handful of what he thought were vitamins, and thus overdoses and needs to be rushed to the hospital.

In a tearful apology to Uncle Phil, played by James Avery, trying to explain his use of the performance-enhancing drug, Will sobs, "I had basketball practice and school, and work ..." before he is interrupted.

"Welcome to the real world, Will," Uncle Phil barked back. "That's no excuse. There's never an excuse."

Where was James Avery — or Uncle Phil — when Alex Rodriguez tried to pour out his heart in an interview with ESPN's Peter Gammons on Monday?


Uncle Phil? That's just ludicrous, John Kampf. Everyone knows that when you need advice, you go to Tim Allen's neighbor, Wilson.

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